Humorous
| By : Sajil | Previous | Next |
| Posted on : 18 Oct, 2005 | Total Views : 463 |
Here are four lines from a love poem I just wrote. After finish reading, I request all of you to make a small analysis before proceeding any further.
"You are an angel from the heaven above
The first day I saw you, I fell in love
Your lips were red as the rose
My heart skipped a beat as you came close"
Now those of you who simply hated these lines probably already know what I'm going to cover in this article and for all others- PLEASE READ ON.
"My love ditched me, my life is hell,
I'm dying inside and there's no one to tell
My only best friend is my knife
Tonight, in a pool of crimson, I'll end my life."
Now if you're still reading I'd say you liked the above lines too, either because you could relate to it or simply because of its poetic genius and very creative rhymes.
"When I kissed your lips, they tasted of wine
I simply shiver at your touch
Oh my sweetheart, I love you so much"
And if any of you ever wrote as well as these lines in this article, kindly do all your readers a favour, and quit the crap.
Now I'm not trying to sound rude or cynical, but just stating what most of us feel, but few bother to speak out.
Such themes have been 'done to death' over the past many years and are nowhere close to 'original'. If anything has derogated this institution called 'poetry', it's the complacent acceptance of mediocrity.
Now I couldn't possibly spell out what you could include in 'your' original poem but the following are few cliches you could avoid.
1) Comparing your love to an angel
2) Comparing her lips or cheeks to a rose
3) Describing your life as hell because your boyfriend/girlfriend left you
4) Rhyming life and knife
5) Over use of the word 'CRIMSON' to describe blood.
6) Describing the disturbing 'voices in your head'
7) Describing 'eyes' as the 'window of the soul'
8) Comparing the taste of a kiss to that of wine. (It was poignant when once done by Omar Khayyam, but not any longer)
9) Holding hands beneath the stars
10) Stereotyping rape as 'loss of innocence'
11) Comparing your tears to 'rain'.
The list could go on and on.....
In no way do I say that 'love' or 'depression' are bad topics to write on, but my simple plea to each one of you-
"PLEASE CARE TO BE A LITTLE MORE ORIGINAL"
Written By : Sajil
