People Jokes

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Mrs.SANTA: AJI SUNTE HO KITCHEN SE NAMAK LANA TO

Mr.SANTA: MUJHE NAHI MILRAHA

Mrs SANTA: MUJHE PATA THA APKO NAHI MILEGA, ISLIYE MAINE PEHLE SE LAKE RAKHDIYA THA

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Long back,
a person who sacrificed his sleep,
forgot his family,
forgot his food,
fogot laughter were called
"Saints"

But now they are called..

"IT professionals"

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1 ladki valintine day pe ik dukan daar ke paas gae aur kaha
kya aap ke paas koi aisa card hai jis pe likha hoo ke main sirf tum se aur sirf tum se pyar karti hoon?
dukan daar bola - gi han hai aisa card.
ladki boli - to plz 2 darjan pack kar do
its dedicate to my love.

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One day Santa told Banta that Hindustan & Bharat are on war.
Banta replied but we live in India

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One day Laloo was travelling by his car. He was going to a village for campaigning .

Suddenly a piglet came before the car. The driver could'nt hit the brake at the right time and unfortunately the baby pig was killed in the accident.

At the sight Laloo was deeply moved and felt very upset. He called the driver and said ,"Jiska ye suuar hai hum usko compensesan dena chahta hoon. Usko dhundke laao".

At his words the driver went to the nearest village and came back after some time with a tilak on his forehead, garlands around his neck and lots of money in his hands!!!

Laloo was surprised . He asked, "Hum tumko kaha tha ke uss aadmi ko laiye, aur tum aise wapas aaye ho! baat kya hai?"

At this the driver replied " I told them about the incident . Hearing it they were rejoiced, put tilak and garlands on me, then danced for some
time and gave this money."

Laloo then asked him "Aap unko eg-jectly kaa bole?"

The driver replied : "Main bola, main Laloo Prasad Yadav ka driver hoon, maine suaar ke bachhe ko mar dala hai."

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Best One:

How amazing!! - A mother makes her son "INTELLIGENT" in 20 years, but a girl makes him "STUPID" in 2 mins.

Second Best:

Arguing with a girl is like wrestling with a pig in the mud. After some time, u realize that u r getting dirty, but the pig is actually
enjoying.

Third Best :

Boys go to college to develop the mind; girls go to college to catch them before this happens.

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Sardar ji is buying a TV
"Do you have color TVs?"
"Sure."
"Give me a green one, please."

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BOLO GOOGLE DEVTAA KI JAI

Om Jai Google Hare !!
Swami Om Jai Google hare
Programmers ke sankat, Developers ke Sankat,
Click mein door kare!!
Om Jai Google Hare !!

Jo Dhyawe vo pawe,
dukh bin se man ka, Swami dukh bin se man ka,
Homepage ki sampatti lawe, Homework ki sampatti karave
kasht mite work ka,
Swami Om Jai Google hare!!

Tum puran search engine,
Tum hi internet yaami, Swami Tum hi internet yaami
Par karo hamari Salari, Par karo hamari appraisal,
Tum dunia ke swami,
Swami Om Jai Google hare.

Tum information ke saagar,
Tum palan karta, swami Tum palan karta,
Main moorakh khalkamii, Main Searcher tum Server-ami
Tum karta dhartaa !!
Swami Om Jai Google hare!!

Din bandhu dukh harta,
tum rakshak mere, Swami tum thakur mere,
Apni search dikhaao, sare reasearch karao
Site par khada mein tere,
Swami Om Jai Google hare!!

Google devta ki aarti jo koi programmer gaawe,
Swami jo koi bhi programmer gaawe,
Kehet SUN swami, MS hari har swami,
Manwaanchhit fal paawe.
Swami Om Jai Google hare.

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Bhola (reading from book of facts): "Do you know that every time I breathe a man dies?"
Pyarelal: "Why don't you use a mouth wash?"

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One man went to the Danse Bar he looked at the Bar Girl and said: Will you Dance with me?
Bar Dancer smiled and said: I don't dance with little boy.
Man: Oh I see! I didn't know that you were pregnent!!!